Jennifer Niven: All the Bright Places

”You are all the colors in one, at full brightness.”

WP_20160731_005-edited.jpg

I had problems. One, maybe two years back. My sadness was only building up, my self-confidence falling as fast as it could. I don’t know whether I was depressed or just genuinely sad, but it was a dark time of my life. I was right at the bottom.

Now, reaching for a book that talks about how mental illness (bipolar disorder, in this case) and depression intertwine with love, I wish it was written before. I feel like it would help me heal mentally and encourage me go back to the person I was before all the troubles started pilling up.

All the Bright Places helps people to see the real problem with mental illness. Through the eyes of two teenagers, Violet Markey and Theodore Finch, you can sense the pain that the two characters go through. If you’re currently hurting and can’t find a way out of your darkness, the book gives you hope that everything will come back where it’s supposed to be. If somebody close to you ever committed suicide, this book might help you deal with the death many people in the world still don’t accept. And if you are one of (not many) people that are completely happy, than this book is not a complete lost, it’s actually a perfect romance story.

But I think writer’s main point was to help people who can’t help themselves. If you’re thinking about suicide, I know you don’t think about anything else. You start losing control over your own mind, feel like you’re trapped inside a cage and you can’t get out no matter how hard you try. With just one thought on your mind: how can you end this suffering. People are born with differences, not only in appearance, but also in destiny. Some are meant to live happily ever after, some are not. Some will break a limb or two, some will get cancer, some will suffer from depression. And isn’t it sad that those three groups of people will most definitely suffer a lot, but not all of them will get the same sympathy. Those with cancer will get flowers, constant visits to the hospital, infinite support from their close ones. Those with broken limbs will heal in a matter of weeks, months, even years, go to rehab and, hopefully, get to live happily ever after. But those with depression will close themselves in their rooms, lying in dark not being able to sleep, living without actually being alive. They won’t receive any flowers. Maybe nobody will notice there is something wrong with them. They might be even called names, accused of being weak, selfish, weird, different. And if they finish their life by themselves, because no one was there to hold their hands while getting healed, people won’t light candles, because they think it’s not OK to commit suicide. Don’t take me wrong, I  don’t think suicide is a solution either, but I understand it. I don’t judge because I’ve been there, and I can only imagine how it feels if it’s, for example, ten-times worse.

As I’ve said before, a good book slightly changes you as a person. Rating it 10/10, not only it was a great light summer reading, but also made me understand suicide, all the pain that I wasn’t able to describe before. It helped me to become more healed, although I believe you can never really leave all things behind yourself. And made me realise that it’s OK to be who you are, to feel what you feel, to share your thoughts with another human being.

Love,

xxx